Do You Know What 77 Years of Oppression Feels Like?

On November 3rd, 2023 around 10:45 PM, my beloved sister and I were standing at a bus stop with our backpacks along with a group of people who had all come from their respective walks of life to gather for a late night bus ride, united by a singular vision. Our designated bus and driver appeared, and we filed onto the bus to take an overnight trip to Washington D.C., reaching Freedom Plaza in D.C. after a long 8 hours. As I exited the bus, I looked around and noticed that a good number of the people stepping off our bus were part of the Queer community. I asked my sister why so many Queer people, like myself, would want to support the freedom of a Muslim majority state like Palestine. She answered, “You all know what oppression feels like right, then why would you not stand for Palestine?”. 

At around 11:00 AM on Saturday November 4th, 2024, the protest began. We are sleep deprived, tired, restless, and waving Palestinian flags. We listened to speaker after speaker before joining the 400,000 strong march around 3 PM. I am holding myself up like a strong American Muslim boy, chanting “Free Free Palestine”. I see a group of protestors carrying a long paper block with the names of innocent humans killed in less than 30 days. I shed a tear. Seconds later, I find myself sobbing and a shiver passes through my body as if someone is pouring my blood out. Moments later, I can’t breath, I am bawling, chasing the butcher block paper printed with the names of the victims of this horrific genocide. I am trying to find the end. I walked a few feet, not finding the end. I continued walking and after 100 or so feet, I reached the end of the paper block.

I fall on the ground, I can’t see, I can’t breathe, my heart is pounding, I raised my hands in dua and all I can say is: 

“Oh Allah, bring us all to peace, bring peace to Palestine, I can’t take this pain anymore, I am hurting, we are all hurting. I beg you for peace and protection of every single living being and every child who is suffering in Gaza. They are human, your creation, and deserve to live in peace like the rest of us. I beg you to stop this pain”. 

For the first time I felt a tiny fraction of the pain that my Palestinian siblings live every moment and I can’t breathe. Maybe I am too sensitive, do you know what 77 years of oppression feels like? 

Kandeel Javid

MPV-Boston Director